Finding Your People

If you’ve often felt like you don’t fit in, listen to this episode of the Awaken Your Wise Woman podcast as host Elizabeth Cush talks about the importance of finding a community that appreciates and supports your highly sensitive self. 

“How many workplaces, events, trainings, parties, groups, relationships have you engaged in that left you feeling drained or overwhelmed or blaming yourself for not being like everyone else?” — Biz Cush

How many jobs or relationships have you had that left you feeling drained? How many parties or events have you been to that felt overwhelming? How many groups have you joined but felt like you didn’t fit in? If any of those scenarios ring true, and you find yourself blaming yourself for not being like everyone else, be gentle with yourself. In this episode of the Awaken Your Wise Woman podcast, host Biz Cush, LCPC, a licensed professional therapist, founder of Progression Counseling in Maryland and Delaware, and soul support for highly sensitive women, wraps up Season Six with insight into how highly sensitive women can find a community where they are supported and their gifts are appreciated. She shares some of the lessons she has learned on her personal journey as she came to respect her sensitivities. She also guides you through a simple somatic exercise to help you feel the difference when your body is telling you when something isn’t a good fit for you and when it recognizes that a situation or group or person is in alignment with your energy. 

You can find the full show notes and resources for this and every episode here- https://www.elizabethcushcoaching.com/awaken-your-wise-woman-podcast

Transcript

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What I didn't realize at the time was that I wasn't made for those situations, or those situations weren't made for me. That being highly sensitive meant that too much noise, bright lights, loud music, too much information coming at me and making small talk left me feeling drained in ways that didn't affect the average person. I didn't realize that I needed more time to process than the average person, that I needed space to ask questions, to get clarity, to be heard. I needed a quiet and calm atmosphere to rebalance my energy. Welcome to the Awaken Your Wise Woman podcast, where we hold your sensitive nature front and center. Because your sensitivity is a gift that needs polishing up every day. In our world of high stimulation, there's rarely a chance to sit back, listen, and go deep. Join me as I hang out with highly sensitive women and the healers who support them as we dive deep into all things sensitive. Healing from childhood wounds, cool alternative methods for growth, and all the ways your sensitivities make you a powerful force to be reckoned with. So let's take a drive or a walk or let's get comfy on the couch with a soft blanket and beverage. You're in for some whole-hearted, soulful conversations with truly amazing women like you. Let's grow a strong community of awakened, sensitive women together. Hi, and welcome back to the Awaken Your Wise Woman podcast. We are wrapping up with season six, which is very exciting. Exciting that we have six seasons under our belt and that the podcast is eight years old, I think, almost nine years old, which is pretty amazing. Pretty darn amazing. And here we are almost at 300 episodes, not quite, but yeah, yeah, very, very proud of the podcast itself, but also so grateful for all of you for being here and being a part of it and making it what it is and how it has evolved over time. So I appreciate you. And if you ever listen to an episode that really lands for you, I would love for you to share it. Share it with a friend, share it with family, share it with a coworker, because the more women we reach, the greater our audience grows and the more the messages go out into the world, which feels really important to me because we need community as highly sensitive women. We need people who get us, who hang with us, who want to have our backs. So that being said, although the podcast, the season is winding down, the circles of sacred sensitivity will continue through the summer. They will continue year-round. And we meet the third Thursday, typically the third Thursday of every month for about 75 minutes. And it's a wonderful group of women. And I hope if you haven't joined us yet, I hope you will. I hope you will. And that's available. You can find out more information on my website, elizabethcushcoaching.com. And speaking of community, that's what we're going to be talking about today on the podcast, because I have found that having a community of highly sensitive women, a community of women who get me and my sensitivities has really been a blessing, a huge positive thing in my life. But have you ever felt like you didn't belong or that you didn't fit in? It's not a great feeling. And as a highly sensitive woman, you're primed for connection, right? We love those deep connections, those conversations that take us into the realness of life. But when it's lacking, or the people surrounding you aren't wired the same way that you are, you might feel like somehow you are the problem. You're the reason that you're feeling disconnected or that you don't fit in. But is that really true? Are we highly sensitive women the problem? How can we be when we are born this way? Something in the universe, the universal genetic sequences created our sensitivities and continues to create them for more sensitive beings to be here on the planet. So that's not a mistake. For me, some of the problem was because I didn't have enough other sensitive people in my life who could appreciate me as I am, I felt like I had to mold myself to try to fit into environments and friendships that really weren't supportive, really didn't get me. And it left me feeling like an outsider. How many workplaces, events, trainings, parties, groups, relationships have you engaged in that left you feeling drained or overwhelmed, or blaming yourself for not being like everyone else? I can remember times where the environmental stimuli, so all the stuff that was going on around me, like the sights and sounds and smells and all of it, it was so intense that all I could do was try to find a quiet spot to sit and observe. That like somehow there was something broken in me that I couldn't just enter this environment with ease and confidence or a sense of settledness within myself, because I wasn't able to just make small talk and assert myself more. Because being highly sensitive and an introvert adds another layer of challenge for us as highly sensitive people. That being highly sensitive meant that too much noise, bright lights, loud music, too much information coming at me and making small talk left me feeling drained in ways that didn't affect the average person. I didn't realize that I needed more time to process than the average person, that I needed space to ask questions, to get clarity, to be heard. I needed a quiet and calm atmosphere to rebalance my energy. And while initially my sensitive traits felt like a burden that I had to carry alone, I've learned that when I find the people, the places, the energies that meet my sensitive needs, I love my sensitive self. And I'm so grateful that I found the people who get me and help me feel good about myself and my gifts. You feel seen and honored for who you are. While the world is not filled with highly sensitive people, there are those souls out there who appreciate you even when they're not highly sensitive. Earlier in this season, in episode 18, I talked about how hard making transitions are for people who are highly sensitive. So they are just hard. It's hard to make change, it's hard to remove yourself from situations that don't feel great. And yet sometimes that's just what we need, especially when we're trying to build a community that really aligns with our soul. And when you begin to recognize the importance of honoring your needs, you might need to move on or away from the people and experiences that feel taxing. When you're working so hard to fit in instead of showing up fully, it's really hard. Because when you're recognizing that that's what you're doing, you know maybe it's time to leave some things behind. They feel your energy, your aligned energy, and they're drawn in, they're drawn to you. So take a moment to be with that. Close your eyes. We're going to do a little experiential exercise here. A little bit of somatic work, a little bit of inner work here to really help you feel what I'm sharing here. So take a minute and close your eyes. Obviously, if you're listening to this podcast while you're driving, not a good idea. But if you're in a place where you can settle in and really attune and be attentive to what we're sharing here, that would be great. So getting comfortable, closing your eyes, bring to mind the relationships or experiences that have left you feeling stressed, depleted, overwhelmed, maybe unseen. And notice as you're bringing that experience or those experiences to mind, take a minute and check in to see where you feel that in your body. As you're remembering those experiences or people or relationships, is there tension or constriction in your heart or your throat or your chest? Maybe there's an ache. Maybe there's a pain in your belly or a sense of unease. Maybe there's numbness, maybe there's no sensations in your body. Or maybe you're feeling some tears or some sadness, some grief. Whatever you're noticing, it's all meant to be there. It's all good. But just take a minute longer and be with whatever feelings or sensations are happening for you in this moment. If it feels comfortable, maybe place a hand on your body where you notice if there are sensations, if you notice where you notice those sensations. Or you can place a hand on your heart for comfort. Be open and listen for any words or images that might arise around this remembrance. And just get curious. Can you hold whatever it is that shows up with compassion and kindness? And allow whatever it is that's showing up for you to just be there right now. And when you're ready, take a deep breath. Maybe give yourself a little hug or put your hands back on your heart if you've taken them away, but giving yourself a little squeeze can feel reassuring and comforting. And now we're gonna shift a little bit. So when you're ready, and you can absolutely pause this, come back to it, journal about what you just experienced. But if you're ready, we're gonna shift a little bit. And I'm gonna ask you to bring to mind relationships or experiences where you felt seen, fully seen and honored and appreciated for being authentically you. A place where you feel like you are seen or can be yourself fully. What sensations do you notice now in your body? Just sometimes it helps me if I close my eyes and just rest my attention in my body. That helps me get a deeper knowing of what's happening inside. It takes away the distraction of the external stimuli. So maybe there's a warmth inside, maybe there's a tingling feeling, or maybe you just feel peaceful and at ease. You might feel numb. Whatever you're feeling is really okay. And you might even notice there's a smile on your face as you bring this remembrance to mind. And again, if it feels okay, you can put your hands on your body where you're feeling the sensations. You can also put your hands on your chest, your heart center, your heart chakra, and just hold that warmth there, noticing the contact of your hands on your body. Can you be with those sensations, whatever it is you're feeling for just a few minutes longer? When you're ready, just taking another slow deep breath. Feel your feet on the floor, reorient yourself in the room, opening your eyes, taking a look around at your environment, and maybe taking another deep breath. What did you notice about those two experiences? How did you feel in each instance? What were the in those two guided practices, what what differences did you notice within yourself? What you were feeling, the sensations in your body, your comfort or discomfort. Yeah, just take a minute to kind of compare the two, see what they both felt like. But we don't always pay attention. Sometimes the messages are really subtle, like a tightness in your chest or your throat, or an ache at the back of your neck, or a headache. But sometimes our body screams at us because the feelings are so intense because what we're experiencing inside wants us to pay attention. Our body wants us to pay attention to what's happening inside. So it might be anxiety or panic or nausea. And all those things are normal. It's just, it takes some time if you have disconnected from your body for whatever reason, trauma or experiences. It takes some intention and practice to retune to your body's wisdom. And with practice, body awareness can help you discern where and who with you can be your most authentic self. And bringing body awareness into the equation. Also helps you identify those experiences that are no longer aligned with you and your heart and your soul and your sensitive being. An amazing thing happened when I began to really listen to my body and honor my sensitive needs. I was able to hold stronger boundaries. I attracted more aligned relationships without having to work so hard at it. And opportunities that really suited my needs appeared and were available to me. Everyone in your circle probably won't be highly sensitive because there are only 20% of us out in the world. But hopefully you already have begun building, or you will be able to build a community made for you that suits your needs and honors you as a highly sensitive person. But as you lean into what you need and you find the time to reset and restore and take care of yourself, you'll feel less exhausted, less overwhelmed, even in the situations that aren't optimal for you. Because when you have your circle that is supportive and kind and compassionate, it fuels you in a way when that resource is depleted. And if you're struggling to find a community, I want you to know that the circle is here. The circle of sacred sensitivity is here. We meet monthly. It is a group of highly sensitive women who are compassionate and kind and funny and smart and brave and soulful. And we're here. And we would love to have you be a part of our community. It's a membership space where not only do you get the live calls, you also get to interact between those live calls. There are resources for you that I post regularly. And yeah, we'd love to have you there. So if you have questions, you want to know more, if this sounds like, oh, that's made for me, I'm happy to schedule a call with you. There's also a form you can fill out if you go to my website, the Circle of Sacred Sensitivity membership is right there at the top of the page at elisabethcush.com. So you can find us there, you can reach out for a phone call, whatever works for you. Now, everyone in your circle probably won't be highly sensitive because there's only 20% of us of the population that are highly sensitive. Although, you know, hopefully there will be some sensitive souls that find you or that you find. But as you lean into what you need and you find the time to reset for yourself the quiet, the solitude, you'll feel less exhausted and less overwhelmed, even in those situations that aren't optimal for you. Because your body is learning that you know how to take care of yourself. And so even when it feels a little disruptive or difficult, you've already figured out how you're going to reset later or you're going to put in place those things that support you. And you're going to have your people that you know are there who have your back. So if you've struggled with finding your people, if you are yearning or longing for a community of women who get you, who understand what it means to be highly sensitive in a world that really was not built for us, we're here. We meet monthly. We listen to each other's concerns or needs, and we are there and have each other's backs. And it's a beautiful space. So it is, if this is something that really resonates with you, if you are curious to know more, I am happy to schedule a call to talk to you about it and to give you more information. You can also find out more information on my website, elisabethcush.com, and you'll find the circle of sacred sensitivity there at the membership button at the top of the page. I think for our souls, it's really important to get the support that we need and to honor our sensitive gifts. Because if we're not honoring ourselves and our needs, it ends up that we have lost that trust in ourselves. We've lost the trust in our intuition. And it's important to get it back. It's important to honor who you are and to be able to live your life authentically and with your full self showing up in the world. I appreciate you all so much. So as we wrap up for season six, I'm already getting inquiries from guests, possible guests for the new season. If there is someone that you feel a highly sensitive woman who is out there with either an amazing story or is a helper healer who supports highly sensitive women, and you think they'd be a good choice as a guest on the podcast, I'd love to hear your insights or your requests or your uh suggestions. But I am honored to be closing out this season six with all of you. And I really look forward to what's next in season seven, which will start back up in September 2026. New episodes will begin to be shared again in the world. If there are episodes again that resonate with you that you feel like another highly sensitive being would resonate with, please share. Please share. It means a lot to me. And it just spreads the message. It just puts us out in the world so that other highly sensitive women find us. And that's the idea behind all of this, right? Community, community, community. We are here, we are building, and I am honored that you were here with me on this journey. So take care of yourselves through the summer. Take care of yourselves as we take a break and a pause. And I look so forward to coming back here at the beginning of season seven. And I'll see you when we return. Thanks for listening to the Awaken Your Wise Woman podcast. The information in this podcast is not a substitute for seeking help from a licensed mental health professional. Music by Andy Cush, sound editing by Laura Dissler, and show notes by Kathy Kush. If you'd like more information about me, Biz Cush, and the resources shared today, go to awakenyourwisewoman.com.